Written 2/7/04, Hoff's Hut, Long Beach, CA, The Back Lounge

"Yurm." Such a useful, and ridiculous, overused (by me), and well loved word. It describes so much of how I often feel. "Yurm."

Scotch and soda in my hand, and a pen in the other. I honestly should have got here earlier. No reflection on Drew and Cuban John, but tonight I wanted to be a mope. Sometimes, when you're feeling it, you gotta run with it, you know?

I met up with them earlier this evening in what should have been a hot run by to say hello. Instead, I ended up watching the end of a drag queen show-off at "Hamburger Mary's." I ask you--WHAT THE FUCK?! HAHAHAHA! But you know...yeah...whichever.

Hung and talked for a while and saw what will be (eventually) snuff_daddy's new place. Nice local, and because he still ain't got no ve-hic-ell, parking shall not prove to be any problem.

Ah! The tuna melt is here...mmmmm mmmm mmm! Onion rings, tuna melt and scotch 'n soda. This...is...yeah...

Half listening to the conversations throught the bar:

The cast party behind me ribbing each other on walking over each other's lines and blocking--

"Then you just stood in front of me when the lights went down"

"...that's what we fucking need--more people standing backstage!"

The group of diners who decided that the bar area was better, came back and ordered drinks. They've been talking about THX sound and DVD players, and the perils of working as a paralegal in a big local firm.

Then there's the employee contraversy over scheduling, or management, or something.

Ah, the handwriting is begining to go out the window...heee....

I spend a little time talking to Julie, the bartender.

"So how long you been working here?"

"About a year and a half. Started as a waitress, serving and got to do work at the bar. And you know, I wasn't really interested. So I'm like 'you know I'm not a big drinker,' and she's like 'well, just try it--get a book.' Yeah, so I did--Bartending for Dummies or something stupid like that; it's worked out well so far.

"Oh, my god--you know they had me start the first night--the friday after Thanksgiving--and oh my god!"

"It was crazy, huh?" I asked.

"Like you wouldn't believe!" She whipes the counter, and then starts washing glasses.

"Do you like it?"

"It's crazy...a little bit hectic, but it's nice. Yeah, I like it."

I mention that the theatre party (they number in the low teens) has co-opted all of her bar chairs.

"Yeah, kinda silly, ain't it?"

"Does this happen all the time?"

"Every six weeks the Long Beach Playhouse People...funny thing they always come in here, and they treat it like their living room. But they're nice people."

"More or less?"

"More or less..."

The vibe here is different from most bars I know (save, maybe Kavanah's); it's warm, almost homely, comfortable, and not unlike a living room. With servers. And a bartender.

The really nice thing about getting here when, well, there's no one at the bar...you get amazingly attentive service, since...you know...there's three of us here, and I'm the guy who doesn't speak up...

The theatre group pipes up again: "Oh! Jesus! There was Chelsea, laying dead on her back, with her legs sticking straight into the air and screaming out 'So who's going to do me next!'"

"Damn...that bitch needs help during her warm ups!"

Woah. One of them there paralegal women folks walked past me. Damn, she smells good.

And there goes one of the old guy crowd. He looks like a natural Santa Clause. Maybe he's a member of the Ordained Order of Real Bearded Santas that I see everywhere. Anyrate, he just strolled up and hit on this really good looking, curly headed girl. Had to be like a third his age...and she smiled at him, and kissed him on his cheek. Yeah, gotta be an old geezer hittin' on them youngin's. That's what it takes now'a'days, huh? Hehehe...

And I'm done, and they're closing down--last call is now 12:30 at this place, since they now close the restaurant at 1:30, where they used to be 24-7.

And it's time to go home, write some, and then all forgiving sleep. though this was what I needed--what had to...what I...I had to go and do this thing I do. Watch people, feed off of their energy. And chose to be ignored, rather than have the normal experience of just being invisible--if not only to myself, if not even everyone.

So there's a drive to be had, some time to spend thinking, a quick reason to smile. About what, I don't know yet, but at least I'm smiling...