(no subject)

It's funny. You get tired, you start to think. But you think in the moments in-between. Like when you're in a car riding on the freeway going from point A to point B. Or standing in the shower as the water runs over your flesh, warm and constant. You think when you're standing in front of an open refrigerator looking for water and snacks. You think while you're brushing your teeth, or sitting in line at Del Taco, or looking at your half done windsor knot on your tie in the mirror.

Thought, written in tired stares, marked by the lines on your forehead, or the bags under your eyes.

I think too much, and that's the thing. I think myself out of things, think myself into things, and think myself into a standstill when trying to do other things. Too much thought, and not enough action.

I tried taking a bit of action on Sunday night. Went out to Liz's club, Discourse to dance, show my face, grab a drink or two. I ended up turning off my thinking for long enough to just flow with flirtation, and earned a short makeout session with one of Liz's friends. Good for her, and dag-nabbit, good for me. Unfortunately, because I had been thinking about all the things that were waiting for me at work on Monday, had the forethought to make sure that Dave and I left early enough to get home. So who knows what else I missed out on. Been thinking about that.

I spent most of Monday thinking about how much work I had to do, how difficult it was going to be to get through, and ended up freaking myself out. Which I really shouldn't do. Because I should just do. But I thought about it. Thought about the meeting that I was going to have to go to, thinking about how little time there was, thinking about how to get stuff done...

Then there was today. I thought about some things, and then just said to hell with it and did them. So most (if not all) of the things that I'd planned on doing today, I got done. I didn't think. Just did. Mostly. And then I thought too much again...until I had no time to think. That was good, I think.

I stayed up rather late last night watching the new Battlestar Galactica. What a great Mini-Series. What a great show. Slightly depressing, but great. Though I think Starbuck should still be a womanizer. Heck, I'd settle for her being a manizer. At least she still smokes cigars and is a wise ass.

Alas, it made me think. Which I really don't want to do right now.

I've got things to do. Things that I need to do for me, the least of which is do laundry...again...but I need to write some things that I promised both to someone else, and to myself to get done. Damn thought. Damn overthought.

But I do know that thought has brought me back here. Back to a place, and a time when I can think about people I love. I've been thinking about many of you. That weird feeling that someone is behind you, smiling. Not the creepy feel, but that strange-there's-someone-there-feeling. That's me, thinking on you.

But I'm still trying not to think too much.